It's been awhile huh. I can't believe that it's April already. Feels just like yesterday when 2013 started, when I collected my results, started working at Bakerzin etc. And now, in just a few months, school is gonna start around the corner, some people have already left my life and I met someone that changed my year.

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I guess it's true when they say that opposites attract. I've always had an instinct that we were gonna be this close but clueless about how. And now, this is it. You're the first. The first person I've changed my opinions that I had for 17 years, the first person I've went so far, the first person who actually made me feel so in awe despite your visual.

When you lectured to me about religious stuffs, I was ashamed, to think that I thought I knew more than you. When you pulled my skirt down because it's too short, I was in awe, to think that you weren't a gentleman. When you scolded me when I wanted to went out with shorts, I was so grateful, to think that no one would ever be so protective of me. When your tears fell when I told you that we're impossible, my heart broke, to think that you didn't think of the relationship much. When I apologized for being so clingy because I'm always  asking for your hand to hold or for kisses on my cheeks and forehead and nose, I was surprised when you then asked for my hand and automatically gave me those pecks; to think that you would be annoyed by my childish actions.

I learn something new about you everyday and I'm always in awe and it's like I'm falling for you bit by bit.
But age.. is it really a matter? Or am I really just actually worried about what others think? But there are some who asked me if it really matter? Love is love, why should age be an obstacle? But idk. I'm confused. I'm scared.

I guess I'll just follow the flow like how we agreed in the beginning. I wish a sign would pop out somewhere somehow. You're the guy I've been searching for all these years; someone who would hold me, who made me laugh without even trying, who didn't act mature, who would assure me, who didn't mind my stupid clingy actions.. but the age gap is too huge to be ignored. I just... idk.